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Rosemary

Rosemary

I had the wonderful blessing of having Christian parents and so attended Church from my earliest days at the old 'Tabernacle' off West Street, Brighton, and went to Sunday School and Youth Group meetings as I grew up.  When I was 16 years old I gradually became aware of the Lord speaking to me through various means, until the evening of 29th August 1965 it was as if shutters were removed from my mind and I just knew that the Lord Jesus loved me and had died on the cross for my sins.  'Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends' (John ch.15 v.13) had particular meaning for me at this time.  

I was baptised on 19th October and was received into Church membership.  I helped in the Sunday School until I left home to do my nursing and then midwifery training.  I then returned to live at home and worked as a midwife at the Royal Sussex County Hospital in Brighton.  Working full time and doing shifts including night duty is very disruptive particularly to one's Church life.  I do praise the Lord that He has watched over me throughout my life.  Although I have often felt inadequate in challenging situations when much has depended on me, the Lord has graciously helped and strengthened me and enabled me to cope. How we do need to look to Him for His wisdom day by day. Many times at work I was under huge pressures, and yet I apparently always appeared calm and in control of the situation!!  Many scriptures have been precious to me, but 'See, I am sending an Angel ahead of you to guard you along the way, and to bring you to the place I have prepared.' (Exodus 23 v. 20) was and is a special encouragement.  Also 'Fear not, for I have redeemed you, I have called you by name, you are Mine' (Isaiah ch.43 v.1).

I have had times when I have felt far away from the Lord, and times of coldness in my heart, but I do thank and praise Him that he is the Lord who doesn't change, and He is the one who is holding me by His right hand.

My sister and I bought a house together in 1980 and I'm very thankful for our special relationship, but I did experience times of loneliness and personal difficulty, particularly facing the issues and responsibilities of being single.  We moved to Haywards Heath in 1987 and I eventually worshipped at Cuckfield Baptist Church.  The passage in Mark ch.4 vv. 35-41 where Jesus is asleep in the boat and then calms the storm has been a great blessing to me. Every time I recall it I feel the Lord is simply saying 'Trust Me'.

The first half of 1993 was a very difficult time, as I experienced dreadful sadness, loneliness and bitterness of heart, and many times I cried out to the Lord for His help.  I wanted Him to 'Remove my heart of stone and give me a heart of flesh' as it says in Ezekiel ch.36 v.26.  The Lord wonderfully brought me out of this distressing experience, and brought dear Martin into my life.  We married in 1994, and I rejoined this Church in 1995.  I really appreciate being able to attend services on a regular basis, which I was unable to do during the 27 years of my nursing career, and am blessed by the faithful, regular exposition of God's Word both to challenge and encourage me in my Christian life. I do desire a closer walk with God and to have a greater love for Him who first loved me.

The Lord continues to strengthen and help me day by day, and although I fear I am rather a slow learner, I do want to learn the lessons he wants to teach me, and to be 'clay in the potter's hands'.  Ephesians ch.3 vv.17 & 19b is a wonderful prayer - 'that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith...and that you may be filled with all the fullness of God'.